#BeautifullyJewish

I saw this hashtag starting to go around from some amazing Jewish women that I follow. It was started in response to some “influencer” (who I won’t even give the dignity of tagging) saying that Jews are traditionally unattractive. We can talk for hours about how messed up that is…. but I’d rather focus on the beauty of this hashtag and these posts.

Like most women, I’ve struggled with body image and loving how I look. All my life, I’ve been told I look “ethnic.” People would ask me where I’m from, if I’m Persian, if I’m Italian, if I’m Spanish. My response would always be “no, I’m just Jewish.” 

Which, when I think about it, is a pretty hilarious response - as if being Jewish is monolith that comes with one particular look. It doesn’t. But it does mean not fitting the standard ideal of beauty as defined by Eurocentric standards… because no matter how some people want to portray us, we’re not just white Europeans. We are one of the world’s few ethnoreligions and there’s something so special to be celebrated in that. Part of the beauty of being Jewish is that we’re a people made up of all different colors, races, and features. And yet, we all have the same geographic roots (the  land of Israel), ancestral roots, and are united by a shared tradition and heritage that goes back thousands of years.  

I remember one time in around 4th grade, a teacher of mine (who wasn’t Jewish) told me I had a “striking profile” and that my nose was so prominent it gave me such a distinct look. She meant it as a compliment, but it stuck with me as yet another thing that made me look “different.” I would often look at myself in the mirror and pick myself apart. My nose is too big and pointy, my face is asymmetrical, my hair is too frizzy and unruly. My body is awkward, my knees are too knobby, my rib cage is too wide, my hips are too big. Add age to that, and I can obsess over the new lines on my face, the circles under my eyes and so much more. 

Part of my work now is to love myself exactly as I am and to love the things about me that make me “different.” Because what is different? And why should it be a bad thing? We need to start challenging the ideas that we’ve all been socialized to believe are what make a woman beautiful. They’re based in Eurocentric, Christian standards that don’t apply to most of the world! What’s beautiful is diversity. How boring would it be if all women had perfectly smooth hair, fair skin, small, thin bodies, and perfectly symmetrical features?

I still struggle, but now when I look at myself in the mirror, I see my mother. I see my father. I see my grandparents and great-grandparents. I see generations and generations of tradition and heritage, of persecution and ridicule… and of strength and resilience.

That’s what being Beautifully Jewish means to me. It means diversity, unity, strength, resilience, and so much more.